


Counting Airplanes

by nobetterlove



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Aged-Up Peter Parker, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, Love Confessions, M/M, Pilot Tony Stark, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Tumblr: starkerfestivals, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:36:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24710119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nobetterlove/pseuds/nobetterlove
Summary: Tony Stark always dreamed about what it might be like to touch the clouds. His father, who runs a garage, wants him to take over the family business. The Air Force gives him the opportunity to be a pilot and finally touch the sky - but some things aren't meant to be. Tragedy strikes and Tony is left with PTSD and a company to run. Many years later, he meets Peter Parker at Uncle Ben's - a new coffee shop he's forced to walk into when Steve & Rhodey are unkind and don't refill. A love story ensues.Or: the one where Tony meets Peter in a coffee shop and he proves to himself that's not nearly as fucked up as he thinks he is.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Comments: 8
Kudos: 101





	Counting Airplanes

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! 
> 
> This is my coffee shop au prompt fill for starkerfestivals bingo! I had a lot of fun researching for this one, so I hope you enjoy.

As a kid, Tony longed to know what it was like, up in the clouds. He spent most summer evenings laying on a blanket out in the back pasture looking at the sky. During those times, the days stretched out as long as they could and right before the sun set for the day, the sky lit up with the most beautiful colors. It set his mind on fire, looking up and wondering what was out there.

Getting older meant stepping away from the ease of lazy June nights – Howard, his father, ran a small garage over by the airfield in town; he catered to the retired military population and took care of everything from motorcycles to airplanes. By his 8th birthday, Tony was a permanent fixture in the garage – he was one of his father’s best workers. His brain was meant for parts and pieces; Tony’s intuition and ability to absorb knowledge made learning the ins and outs of engines, transmissions, and everything in between simple.

For Tony, the real fun began when he turned 15. His father, having a hard time juggling all the different aspects of the business, let Tony take control of the airplane repair and maintenance. His brain was constantly seeking out challenges and the small stuff wasn’t satisfying – Howard was smart enough to realize the talent he had on his hands and finally did something Tony suggested.

Much to his surprise, that part of the business started to boom. Tony quickly found a love for planes and the complex engines and physical properties that comprised them. At that point in his life, they were the way he could stay connected with the sky. He and his best friend Steve were totally taken by the idea of being pilots and being around planes like the ones they repaired on a constant basis.

The rest of Tony’s high school experience revolved around getting the best grades he could, working in the hangar’s garage, and ignoring his father’s disapproving looks. Stark’s was a family business and his father expected him to take it over. Tony wanted more, though – he wanted to know what it was like to touch the sky and to take control of the humongous scientific masterpieces he marveled at on a daily basis.

Admission to the MIT Air Force ROTC program came in October of Tony’s senior year – the first step to his dream coming true sitting in the envelope he carelessly pulled open. It came with a full scholarship and a direct link to the officer core. At most, he owed four years of service and at the very least, he would have a functioning job in his career field of choice. His father didn’t see it that way, but the money attached to his admission meant it didn’t matter what Howard had to say.

Without having to work multiple hours a day after school and on weekends, Tony flew through his college courses; where most people took 5 years to get through the Aerospace Engineering program, it took Tony only 3. He willingly took the early entry into the pilot program and made his way to Laughlin Air Force Base in Texas. The 3-year training program was rigorous and finally demanded everything out of Tony – for the first time in his entire life, he felt challenged.

Leaving for the deserts of Iraq was not how he figured he’d spend his first assignment, but the state of affairs in the US forced his hand. They ran tactical missions, refueling runs, and every now and again, offensive fly overs. The 18 months he spent there seemed to go by so fast and drag all at once. Tony got excited every time they went out on a mission, only to come back a little worse for the ware and more disappointed than before.

The very last mission Tony flew during his time there ended up being the most exciting. It was supposed to be a simple refueling exercise. The big tanker would fly right above them and connect to the fuel port. All he had to do was hold steady and they’d be in the air for another 12 hours. They were right where they should be when the right wing got clipped by some sort of missile strike – it made the entire aircraft shake and lose connection to the fuel tanker above it.

To say that the fuel hose puncturing the front pane of glass was a bad thing seemed like a total understatement. As he shouted into his radio ‘mayday, mayday’, Tony realized the uselessness in it. The crew in the back were all experienced – he hoped to the powers above that they remembered the crash-landing protocol. The pressure on the inside of the cabin changed immediately; he’d been in so many training exercises reenacting that very moment – but nothing compared to the real thing.

It was the many years of hearing horror stories from pilots in the shop that allowed Tony to set the plane down without taking it apart into several different pieces on the comedown. He gripped the reins tight and followed the momentum – his actions just enough to save all four lives of the people on the plane. Still a little woozy from the huge change in atmospheric pressure, Tony leaned into the seat he was still secured in and let the cut across his eyebrow bleed steadily into his eye – what else did he have to do? They were in the middle of the desert with very little supplies and even less water. The prognosis was not very good.

In the end, death by water deprivation was not to be there fate.

After trying the radio over and over again, Tony threw the receiver and let out a defeated huff. They weren’t going to be able to sit idly in the aircraft for very long. His navigation skills weren’t the greatest, but he did understand what enemy territory was. The rest of the crew found him right as he was collecting everything he could from the cockpit – including the handheld radio, just in case.

Wandering around the desert in the middle of the afternoon seemed pretty stupid – Tony felt every ounce of water in him draining with every step they took in the midday sun. He also knew that if they stopped, they were done for.

The sound of a vehicle accelerating a couple hours into their journey had all four of them looking up with hope – only to be reminded that more than one danger lived in the sands blowing swiftly by their faces.

The worst part about being taken by enemy forces was the bag over his head. He remembered the torture training they received right before graduating pilot’s training – five days’ worth of learning how to negotiate, being put in boxes, and enduring waterboarding. Tony held steady throughout, until they put the bag over his head – the sensory deprivation felt a little like losing his mind. Luckily, they weren’t far from their destination and they tore it off of him to pull him out of the truck and into a chair with a bright light right above it.

Upon seeing the stripes on his uniform, Tony was signaled out – they wanted blueprints and specs for the latest planes the USAF was flying over top of them. Tony knew each of the aircrafts front to back and could easily help them, yet – he held fast. In all likelihood, they were going to kill him – he knew that and understood that going down with his secrets was the only way he was going to let that happen. He signed up for this very moment – the ultimate application of all the skills he’d ever learned.

Every day, Tony was brought into the same holding cell and cuffed to the chair – he’d become so photophobic from the light shining in his eye that it immediately made him nauseous. They questioned and threatened him, all while reciting the names of every person he ever cared about – the list one Tony rattled off in his head over and over again, beating them to the punch.

It was the same routine for six months – Tony gauged the days by the length of his facial hair and the thinness of his arms. His captors kept them all just on the worst side of hungry – they wanted them delirious, on the verge of doing anything for the slightest bit of relief. Tony had to give it to his fellow brothers and sisters in arms – they stood united and took the punishment with barely bent heads and eyes wide open.

When they were finally rescued, Tony kept silent until they were safely ensconced in Rhodey’s aircraft – his best friend from pilot training the only person he would trust to get him back to some semblance of safety. Only then did he let himself sigh with relief, the tears coming before he even knew it. Tony finally let all the emotions he’d been bottling inside flow through him – after all the time in captivity, he knew he’d never be the same.

The flight home was more somber than he ever could have imagined. Two days before coming home, Howard died of a fatal heart attack. For a long while after hearing the news, Tony figured the last week had been a complete hallucination and he was still back in the cell, curled up and waiting for the next time the door would open. The reality of the situation didn’t really hit home until he was standing in front of a smooth black casket – the only family he had left two seconds away from being buried in the ground.

He never really cared for his father – the man didn’t appreciate his dreams and wrote him off. Tony didn’t think his death would hit so hard, but it did, anyway. The thought of staying in the service when he got home made his skin crawl – so he took medical retirement and got out as quickly as he could. The Air Force gave him many things, including the opportunity to be a pilot and fly some of the coolest aircrafts – but it also left him with a permanent scar on his right eye and PTSD that felt like a heavy monkey on his back.

It only seemed right that after all the time and effort he put into avoiding the family company, that he ended up with it. In all the time he’d been away, Tony realized that simplicity was exactly what he wanted. He knew what it was like between the clouds and could easily get that same feeling from the safety of the cockpit of the little planes he kept in the hangathere r. If nothing else, his experience gave way to a deeper understanding of himself.

Pleasing his father by finally taking the company, even if it was after his death – that had to count for something.

\----

That lovely adventure happened 14 years ago.

Since then, Tony made a name for Stark’s – the place becoming strictly for aircrafts and diesel engines. He didn’t want to spend too much time finding people to run the car and motorcycle maintenance – his expertise existed in the realm of airplane engines and all the parts and pieces associated with them. He hunted down Steve and Rhodey a couple years after acquiring the business and converted them to the soothing nature of grunt work. Between the three of them, they handled multiple big-ticket companies and kept a steady local clientele.

For all intents and purposes, Tony could claim happiness. At least, he felt content enough to say that he wasn’t unhappy. Nightmares still plagued him and sometimes loneliness settled deeply within him, but he was okay – that was all he’d ever really known.

A Friday in the middle of October, Tony walked into the main building of the garage, his head aching from the lack of caffeine in his system. He took an early morning consultation a couple hours away and didn’t have the time or patience to stop in either direction. They’d be getting a couple carriers worth of engines to pick apart and modernize in the next couple of hours – he wanted to be prepared.

Upon finding the pot empty and all of the coffee that went into the machine to make another gone too, Tony took a look around the kitchenette with wide eyes. “I’m not the only one that can buy coffee around here, right?” he asked out loud, his voice resonating in the otherwise empty room. Biting down on his lip in frustration, Tony pulled out his phone, immediately pulling up the map app to find the nearest coffee shop. The first one on the list was less than two miles away – a brand new place, Uncle Ben’s. Shaking his head at the weird name, Tony selected it and let the map pop up.

As it turned out, the coffee shop was just outside the garage’s property – the strip mall that it sat in a new addition to the slowly developing town. A soft sigh left Tony’s lips when he pulled in. For a brand-new place, it looked homey and welcoming – nothing like the cookie cutter inside of a Starbucks. He took a minute to collect himself; going into public places was still hard for him, even after all of this time.

Once he felt grounded enough to get out of his car and turn his back on the world, Tony walked into Uncle Ben’s. The first thing that hit him was the amazing smell of coffee beans – he recognized the big grinder pressed against the wall and immediately knew the stuff he was about to get would be good. When he bothered with the nicer things in life, Tony had a pretty decent setup in his apartment.

The next thing that smacked him in the face was the very cute man standing behind the counter. His unconventional uniform of blue jeans and a dark red flannel made Tony smile – there wouldn’t be anything stuffy coming out of this place. Tony’s eyes were drawn to the open look on the man’s face – deep brown eyes framed by long lashes caught his gaze. The man grinned at him, his full lips pulling him in further.

“Hey! Welcome to Uncle Ben’s – I’m Peter. What can I get you today?” The pitch of his voice rung in Tony’s ears and settled low in his stomach. For whatever reason, Tony couldn’t keep his heart from beating against his chest, the feeling one he wasn’t all that familiar with. Ducking his head, Tony sucked in a breath.

“Hi, Peter. Can I get your darkest roast as black as you can make it in the largest size?” Tony asked, his eyes watching Peter’s face for a reaction to the insanely boring order. He spent most of his college days living off of burnt coffee from the pot his roommate forgot to take off the burner – the taste of anything sweeter made his mouth prickle just thinking about it. If he thought it was weird, Peter didn’t show it.

While Peter keyed in his order, Tony took a second to take a good look at him. His hair was on the longer side, styled just enough to look swooped back, but messy because that’s how it fell naturally. The apples of his cheeks were red, almost like there was a permanent blush there, camping out to make sure they stayed rosy. Eyelashes that were sinfully long brushed his cheek. In other words, he was absolutely stunning.

“So, the darkest roast as big as I can make it is $2.50. Is there anything else I can get you?” The pull of his lips and the crinkle of his eye shouldn’t have been as distracting as it was. Tony found himself really having to process the question before answering it.

“No, that’s it,” replied smoothly. He didn’t do a lot of eating throughout the day, especially when there was a big job looming over him. Anxiety made his insides squirm, the less food he put in his stomach, the better. Making the sudden decision to relax against the counter, Tony let his hip rest there, his body in no hurry to move. Right before walking in, Tony was impatient and agitated – in a hurry for some reason.

Now, though – he had all the time in the world; especially if it meant getting to sneak a couple more peeks at the cute barista behind the counter. There weren’t any other people milling around – maybe he could pull it together long enough to actually make conversation with the beautifully intimidating human he already felt a magnetic type pull towards.

Digging into his pocket, he pulled out his wallet and went about the process of paying with his credit card – the old USAA logo in the corner making his skin prickle slightly. Peter’s voice had him looking up – “You’re Tony Stark.” The words were said with conviction, like he was so sure, he’d absolutely put money down on it. He quickly put his wallet away and pressed his palms to the counter.

“That would be me,” he replied, quirking his brow. “Have we met before?” Tony knew for sure that he’d never seen this person in his life. The gorgeous gleam in his eye would be a hard thing to forget.

Peter handed him his receipt, his head shaking. “We haven’t. Stark’s is the one thing people mentioned when I looked into opening the shop here. In my curiosity, I let Google tell me a bit about it. You and the major switch you made to aerospace made a lot of different newspapers. Seemed to shock a lot of people.” He pushed back from the counter then, his feet carrying him between the different machines seamlessly.

Tony watched him with interest, his eyes still wide form Peter’s admission of researching him – well, not him so much as his company, but it was still something.

“Before I joined the military, I spent a lot of time getting the aerospace portion of the business started. When I got back, it only made sense to steer it towards bigger engines and more specific clientele. Narrowing the industry is always big news.” Tony spoke freely, his body thrumming with a sort of energy he hadn’t felt in a long time. This sort of chemistry surprised him – he wanted to see where it would lead.

“That makes sense. People aren’t really used to change, are they?” Peter smiled at him and placed a large cup of coffee down in front of him. It smelt heavenly, the rich aroma of the fresh coffee bean sitting in his nostrils and taking hold – he would gladly let that smell wrap him up for the rest of the day. Tony pulled the cup closer to him and threw his own smile Peter’s way.

“You said it, Pete. There’s not enough room for innovation. Unless you don’t give any other option, then there’s really nothing anyone can do about it,” Tony shrugged his shoulders – he followed orders to the t when it was absolutely necessary. With the freedom to do what he wanted; he was going to do exactly that. Despite the immense fear he felt every time he got into the cockpit of a plane – Tony’s interest and skill remained.

Thinking on his feet, Tony shifted the conversation in Peter’s direction. He didn’t move away or make it seem like talking to Tony was an obligation. It spurred him on, Tony for the first time in a while somewhat desperate to make a connection. “How long have you been open? I haven’t done anything other than pass through town in ages.” It was true, too – he avoided public places and curious eyes. People that knew him when he was younger knew way more than he was comfortable with, and those that didn’t know him – well, he didn’t like strangers much, either.

“I got the keys about six months ago and got the doors open about a month after that. I finished my MBA last summer and decided that small town USA was the place to open my weird little café.” Watching Peter cross his arm, Tony bit down on a smile. His body language and restless limbs were just as cute as the softness in his smile and the curl of his hair. “What brought you in today? Since you’re not usually one to join the masses.”

Finally impatient enough to want the kickstart of the caffeine despite the heat of the beverage, Tony pulled the cup to him and tossed back a couple big gulps of it. Despite how hot it was, Tony was overwhelmed by the taste. It was rich and earthy, bitter on the tongue the exact way he liked it. He took a second to truly enjoy it before answering, the jolt of caffeine was exactly what he needed. 

“The guys in the garage didn’t leave any trace of coffee anywhere in the office. I run off the stuff, so I needed a fix quicker than the grocery delivery order could get there,” Tony let the words roll off his tongue, the ease in which he was talking something new – he only felt comfortable enough to speak freely with Steve and Rhodey. “I’m glad this is where Google Maps brought me. This is the best coffee I’ve ever had.”

A shot of anxiety ran through him when he realized what he said – it sounded way more sensual coming from his mouth than he ever anticipated. Taking another scalding sip, Tony avoided bright eyes for a second, the warmth on his cheeks threatening to become a harsh blush with every increased beat of his heart. The sound of a deep laugh had him looking up, the red spreading across his cheeks, regardless.

Locking eyes with Peter, Tony forced himself to take in a deep breath. He felt hot all over, like the dredges of his anxiety attacks were moving in – just, without the flushing rush of fear. Instead, it felt like a something he hadn’t let himself feel in forever; arousal. Bringing his bottom lip between his teeth, Tony shifted his feet a little – his body unable to stand stationary in that moment.

“I’m glad it brought you here, too,” Peter started, his eyes still gazing into Tony’s bulging a little with the confession. Tony felt his cheeks turn up a little, the look obviously enough to calm Peter down enough to let him continue. “I admittedly spent way too much time researching coffee beans and how to get the best flavor from them. I even took a trip to Costa Rica to learn more about the bean and all the different blends. One of the coolest trips ever.” Peter’s smile translated into his words, the last few sounding so wistful, so carefree.

Tony spent the next few minutes listening to Peter talk about the different coffee plantations he visited and the black beaches that were popular around the country. Tony remembered flying over the volcanic regions just for fun during an air strike but didn’t get to experience the beauty like Peter described it. He used so much emotion to talk about the things he liked, it was hard to imagine not wanting to try whatever Peter talked about.

A swift buzz against his hip drew him out of the trance he’d been in – Tony thought listening to Peter could easily be something he got carried away in. He dug into his pocket and checked the screen; Steve was reminding him about the Boeing delivery expected at the garage any time. Shaking his head, Tony didn’t bother responding – it would take less than five minutes to get back to the garage and he hadn’t seen any big trucks pass by the window from where he was standing.

“Looks like it’s back to work for me. Thanks for the coffee, Pete,” Tony mumbled, raising the cup in his hand. He felt himself smiling widely – his muscles a little sore from the lack of use. Tony didn’t smile, not really. There weren’t many things to get excited about in his life. It felt easy, though – directing the look Peter’s way. There was a weird sizzling energy crackling between them; Tony wondered if Peter could feel it, too.

“Here,” Peter replied quickly, his hand landing on top of Tony’s softly. “Let me top you up.” The same hand on his own reached out – Tony wordlessly passed him the cup, their fingers brushing ever so slightly. Every part of his skin Peter touched felt like it was on fire – the burn of it licking his skin, the caress sending so many conflicting thoughts and feelings back to his brain in an attempt to be processed.

The pass back was just as tantalizing, Peter smiled widely at him – his cheeks crinkling in the cutest way. “You have a business card, Mr. Stark?” Peter questioned, his hands bringing a crystal fish shaped bowl front and center. It had a card taped to it that said, ‘enter for free coffee for a year’. Peter shook it up, then pushed it towards Tony.

Pulling his wallet back out, Tony found a couple in the pocket and dumped one in the bowl. He quirked his eyebrow, a chuckle leaving his lips. “I wouldn’t mind winning that one.” He emphasized his point by taking a big gulp of the warm coffee. “Thanks again, Pete.” Pushing the door open with his back, Tony waved at him before walking out of the store and climbing into his truck as quickly as he could.

Tony spent the drive back to the garage trying to decipher exactly what went down back in the coffee shop. He didn’t know how to feel about the crazy reaction he had to a complete stranger – and how, just after a couple minutes of talking, Peter didn’t feel like a stranger at all. The thoughts carried him all the way into the garage where Steve and Rhodey were gathered around the specs he brought back with him that morning.

“Hey, boss – what’s got you looking so loopy?” Steve asked, his words bringing Tony from the dreamy haze he’d been in. The words almost didn’t register, the thoughts in his head really scrambling his brain.

Tony shook his head and brought the coffee cup up for them both to see. “I found the coffee I hope to drink for the rest of my life. You assholes left the dregs of a burnt pot, so I had to improvise.” His tone sounded a little guarded, but that wasn’t something terribly unusual.

Rhodey snorted and got up from the table, his hand wrapping around Tony’s shoulders. “I’ve only seen that look on your face one other time in my life, Stark. Remember Tommy Driver?” He pulled Tony tight against his side, the man looking him square in the eye. Tony absolutely remembered Tommy Driver and hoped to never think about the useless crush ever again.

“Fuck you, Rhodes. The new place, Uncle Ben’s – the man who owns it is devilishly handsome. I may have noticed.” The words sounded a little pained being dragged out of his mouth like that – at the same time, it felt good to tell the truth, to admit that yes, maybe he did find himself liking someone for the first time since pilot training. Shaking Rhodey off, Tony walked a little further into the room.

Steve and Rhodey shared a look, the two idiots beaming at each other. “He must have met Peter, then,” Steve remarked. Tony looked between them, a shocked look on his face.

“You guys know him?” Tony crossed his arms over his chest – the petulant tone of his question right on point.

“Yeah, Tony – we don’t live in the garage like you do. Uncle Ben’s has been open for a while and their coffee is fantastic.” Rhodey shrugged his shoulders, the not sorry look on his face making Tony smile despite the moodiness he wanted to project. There was a reason these two were his best friends.

“I’m slightly offended neither of you thought to bring me a cup of this before. It really is great.” Tony looked between them, flipped them both the bird, then sat down at the table where the specs were still sitting. “Now sit down, honey bear – we’ve got some work to do.”

\----

About a week later, Tony woke up behind his desk – his phone buzzing against the empty coffee mug yanking him from the uneasy sleep he’d been in. Unwanted dreams seemed to be haunting him the last couple of days and sleep, when he could get it, felt more like torture than actual rest. Rubbing at his eyes, Tony grabbed at the phone to stop the buzzing. He wanted to ignore it, but the suggested contact ( **Maybe: Peter Parker** ) attached to the text caught his eye.

Straightening up a little bit more, Tony blinked liberally in an attempt to force the waking up process to work a little quicker. He let the facial recognition open the phone, his finger hovering over the text app for a moment – all the of the sudden, he felt nervous. In the days since meeting him at the coffee shop, Tony hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Peter – the gorgeous brunette with warm hazel eyes and cheeks as red as cherries. It seemed silly, to be so dopey over someone he didn’t even know.

He made his thumb press on the screen and open up his text messages, the one highlighted still making his chest ache with nervousness and excitement.

**Maybe: Peter Parker** : Hi, Tony Stark! This is Peter Parker from Uncle Ben’s. I had the drawing this morning and your business card was the lucky pick.

 **Maybe: Peter Parker** : Free coffee for a year is officially yours.

Tony felt himself smile – lucky wasn’t usually on his side. In all of the times of entering something like that, this was his first time actually winning. Looking at the messages for another minute, Tony quickly changed Peter’s contact information, then typed his own message back.

**Tony Stark** : Hi, Peter Parker. This is one of the best text messages I’ve ever gotten.

 **Tony Stark** : But, just so I know – what does free coffee for a year actually mean?

 **Tony Stark** : Is it an unlimited thing, or do I have a little punch card that keeps track of how much of your coffee I’m consuming?

He shook his head at the lameness of his old self but sent them off anyway – he didn’t know how to socialize with humans, he figured if Peter was actually worth all the pining he was doing, he wouldn’t mind Tony’s awkwardness. Maybe he’d appreciate it, even.

**Peter Parker** : Glad to have made your day, Tony Stark.

 **Peter Parker** : Since you don’t drink anything fancy, I’m not really worried about you coming and grabbing coffee whenever you want. I have dark roast for days, my friend.

 **Peter Parker** : Just don’t abuse the niceness.

**Tony Stark** : You might get tired of seeing me.

 **Tony Stark:** I would never.

**Peter Parker** : I’m not sure that’s possible.

 **Peter Parker** : I genuinely believe that.

**Tony Stark** : Oh? That’s a bold thing to say. You don’t even know me.

 **Tony Stark** : Do I project good vibes, or something?

**Peter Parker** : You’re not much of a talker. It’s going to take a lot of visits to even get to know you, let alone get tired of you.

 **Peter Parker** : Yeah, or something. Your friends speak highly of you. James and Steve.

 **Peter Parker** : You listened to me talk about coffee beans for twenty minutes and didn’t look bored once. I think that says a lot.

**Tony Stark** : You might be on to something. Though, I can talk – I’m just not good at it in public. Public in general is a lot for me.

 **Tony Stark** : James – I haven’t heard anyone call him that in years. I’ll have to give him shit for that.

 **Tony Stark** : I like coffee beans. I used to have a fancy press like the one in your store. I wanted to be in Costa Rica with you.

Looking at the words he’d just sent, Tony felt his cheeks flare up. It felt easy, talking to Peter – the words were just coming to him, ideas and thoughts he hadn’t been able to grasp in years were floating around his brain, waiting to be used. The cloudiness of disturbed sleep was gone, a sense of clarity overtaking him instead.

**Peter Parker** : Oh. How are you with one on one type situations? If you’re in a place of comfort, or course.

 **Peter Parker** : I have no idea what you’re talking about – but it seems like you guys are always ragging on each other for something. Have you all been friends long?

 **Peter Parker** : Used to? You left a piece of equipment like that behind? Next time I go, you can come.

**Tony Stark** : It’s much better. I have a feeling I could muster up the courage to talk to you just about anywhere, though.

 **Tony Stark** : We call him Rhodey – it’s a thing in the military to call each other by our last names. We do, though – rag on each other. I’ve known Steve since I was a kid. Rhodey and I went through pilot training together.

 **Tony Stark** : I left a lot of things behind. Oh yeah? I’ll hold you to that.

**Peter Parker** : Then I’ll hold you to that. Any chance you’d like to get a drink or something sometime?

 **Peter Parker** : That makes a lot of sense, actually. No wonder they kept calling you Stark.

 **Peter Parker** : So, you were a pilot? Was that always the dream? Do you still fly?

 **Peter Parker** : Hm. Sounds like there’s a story there. Good, please do.

**Tony Stark** : Maybe not a drink – but I’d love to go out. Ever been in a two-seater plane before?

 **Tony Stark** : I still am. I just don’t do it in the Air Force, anymore. The dream started out as wanting to touch the sky. When I realized how cool planes were, it kind of evolved from there.

 **Tony Stark** : Isn’t there always?

After agreeing to go up flying with Tony a couple of days later, Peter excused himself to get back to work. Tony sank down into the chair he’d been sitting in scrolling through the entirety of their conversation a couple of times. It went from 0 to 60 pretty quickly, but Tony was surprisingly okay with that. Everything with Peter up until that point felt completely natural – that had to mean something.

The day of the date quickly approached and to take the edge off, Tony took the opportunity to get some of his free coffee. He stepped into Uncle Ben’s when he figured it’d be in a lull – Peter was the only one behind the counter looking up at him with a grin when he walked in. “Tony, hey!” Peter greeted him happily, his long legs carrying over to the counter. “Darkest roast as black as I can make it?”

Tony nodded at him, his cheeks quirking up in a small smile. “Yeah, Pete – thanks.” He took a deep breath and let himself take the other man in while he went about putting coffee in a to-go cup for him. “It’s nice to see you,” Tony mumbled, his hands staying in the pocket of the puffy vest he’d been sporting since he got out of his work clothes from the morning. His eyes strayed to the spotless counter before looking up and catching Peter’s.

“It’s nice to see you, too. And without the hat today. I like the look – it suits you,” Peter said, pointing up at the hair that he was still letting dry on his head. They did some work on one of the jets and he was disgusting when they were done – the last thing he wanted to do was go see Peter covered in sweat and grime. Unconsciously, he ran his fingers through it, his shyness ruling him.

“I got covered in engine oil this morning. We’re working on a Sentry right now and we’re hitting a bunch of hiccups. I don’t usually leave the house without one, honestly.” Tony replied, his fingers wrapping around the warm cup gratefully. “Thanks, though – I’ll remember that for later.” At that, Tony brought his head up and beamed. Peter was looking back at him with the same look, his eyes alight.

Peter stepped away from the counter again, his hands moving through the process of making another cup of coffee. When he added the foamy milk on the top, Tony made a face. He hadn’t been able to do overly sweet stuff in a long time – the sweetness reminding him of the way his mouth felt puckered with thirst all that time ago. “Can you sit for a bit? There shouldn’t be too much of a crowd for at least an hour or so.” Peter looked towards the small table at the back of the restaurant.

Tony could do nothing but nod, his stomach clenching for about two seconds before he realized that Peter left him the chair where he could see the rest of the coffee shop. Letting out a sigh of relief, Tony settled in the surprisingly comfortable chair and took a couple of calming sips of the coffee in his hands.

“I did the maintenance on the plane we’re taking up later – she’s going to run perfectly,” Tony remarked, his nervousness forcing him to break the silence. He felt a tremor run through him, the feeling of it almost enough to pull him out of the chair and out the door. At what seemed the right time, Peter smiled at him and made him feel a little bit better.

He watched long fingers wrap around the same brown cup in his own hands and bring it to pink lips – Peter took a long drink, the length of his throat bobbing with each sip. It shouldn’t have looked as good as it did – and Tony probably shouldn’t have been staring as hard as he was. Peter didn’t seem to mind, though – he met Tony’s eyes with a smirk and placed a hand on top of Tony’s. “You’ll have to show me around under the hood. I’d love to see what you’re working with.”

Tony tilted his head, his brows scrunching together. “You’re interested in that kind of stuff?” They were still trying to get to know each other, so Tony was surprised – there weren’t a lot of people that even pretended to be interested in the nerdy mechanisms Tony worked with on a daily basis.

“I have a degree in Mechanical Engineering, actually. I wanted to go into the car industry but got hooked when on business when I did my internship my senior year. They stuck me in marketing, and I haven’t looked back since. So yes, I am. I’d love to see the engine, at least.” He didn’t seem to mind Tony’s surprise, the smile on his face just as genuine and real as before.

He couldn’t help the way his hand turned over and gripped at Peter’s – the more he got to know him, the easier it was to allow himself to let go of the uptight control he always tried to have. “I’ll gladly show you anything you’d like to see.” Tony’s fingers stroked the inside of Peter’s wrist where they were settled, the pulse picking up a little at the contact.

They spent a few more minutes idly chatting back and forth before the bell on the door chimed. Peter’s face fell for a second before he got himself back together and shot Tony a deflated look. “I’ll see you tonight, right?” Peter’s question made Tony’s heart beat a little faster, the excitement of getting to see Peter on his own turf was almost too much.

“Right. I’ll be in the shop the rest of the day. Just let me know when you’re heading my way.” Tony gave Peter’s hand one more squeeze before getting up, his legs a little weak from sitting there for so long. “I can’t wait,” Tony whispered as he passed by Peter’s shoulder – the shiver he saw run along the other’s back so satisfying. It felt good to know he had some physical effect on Peter. Tony responded to him the second they were in the same room, a little assurance it was mutual wasn’t the worst thing.

\----

Two filter replacements and another shower later, Tony was waiting impatiently in the office. Peter sent him a text saying he was on the way a few minutes ago – the second he received it, Tony’s heart started to beat out of his chest. He felt a little lightheaded from the elevated blood pressure and knew that pretty soon, the tizzy he was trying to stave off would end up winning.

Looking in the mirror right over the sink, Tony messed with his hair, running his fingers through it. His head felt slightly naked without the hat on it – it’d been a mechanism of armor for him since coming home. He’d been wearing the same dirty one for 14 years.

A slight tap on the front door brought Tony out of his musings, Peter was smiling at him, his outfit completely different from the one he’d been in earlier. The jean jacket made him look even younger than he actually was – a feat that made Tony feel old for a second. It didn’t stick, though, his brain too focused on Peter and all the good things his body felt when the man was around.

Undoing the lock on the door, Tony pulled it open and moving a hand in a welcoming gesture. “Hey, Pete. Welcome to Stark’s,” he said softly. Peter stepped in and let a hand brush against Tony’s chest. He was all of the sudden glad that he skipped the vest and settled for the thin Henley shirt he kept in his locker. Tony’s skin pebbled as the warmth of Peter’s hand moved across it.

Peter looked around, then stared longingly towards the back of the building – the door to the hangar on the far side open. “Hey, Tony. I’m so excited. I haven’t seen a garage like this before. Or been in the front seat of a plane.” Peter pressed his hands together in excitement, Tony imagining the little claps the other man obviously held back on. “Where’s everyone else?”

Tony thought back to the conversation he had with Steve and Rhodey just half an hour earlier, the two of them packing up long before the time of day they usually did. “Where are you guys going?” Tony asked, his hands still covered in grease and wrapped around a wrench. His time was dwindling down, but that didn’t mean the others weren’t able to keep on working.

“Trust me, Tones – you’re going to want us to not be around. Take him up in the air and wow him with your pilot skills. Then bring him back here and enjoy the peace and quiet of the emptiness,” Rhodey answered for both him and Steve, the other man looking at him with the same stare of seriousness. Tony shrugged and let them walk out the door – with a little bit of time to think on it, they were totally right – Steve and Rhodey being there was the last thing he wanted.

“Rhodes and Steve decided to take the night off. Thought maybe we might want to spend some time together without an audience, I guess.” Tony felt a reluctant smile bloom on his cheeks – his friends weren’t very subtle, but he liked where their hearts were at. It’d been a long time since he’d been out on a date – and even longer since that date actually mattered the way it did with Peter. The guidance was nice, Tony couldn’t deny that.

A soft nod was the only response Tony got from Peter, the ease in which he accepted things a nice change of pace. Walking past him, Tony grabbed Peter’s hand on his way out the door, the other man tangling their fingers together easily. “Want to start with the flight, or would you like to see the planes first?” Tony posed the question while they walked across the small distance to get into the part of the hangar that actually held the planes.

The plane he prepped to take into the air was in the center of the open space. All of their work areas were off to the side, the huge jacks and machinery they needed to be able to move the parts and put them up to get inside. It was far from spotless, but Tony was proud of the work they’d been doing to the space over the years. Peter looked around with a sense of awe, his slack jaw one of the cutest things Tony could remember seeing.

It took the other man a few seconds to answer, the deer in the headlights look of someone who was experiencing something for the first time staying there even as he spoke. “I think I’d like to go up first. I might spend too much time nerding out if we start with the parts and pieces.” Peter spoke with such clarity, despite the fact that he was still looking around a little star struck.

Nodding, Tony gave Peter’s hand a quick squeeze and pulled him towards the plane waiting for them. He opened the passenger side door, his hand reluctantly dropping Peter’s. “There’s a set of headphones sitting on the seat, put them on when you get buckled in,” Tony murmured, his eyes flashing with excitement when Peter climbed in without any hesitation. A long time ago, Tony would’ve taken the cockpit like that, too – the inside of a plane used to be his happy place. Now, he forced himself to take a few breaths before he got in behind the controls, his hand trembling slightly.

It took Tony a few extra minutes to get through his pre-flight checks – he wanted to make sure he was thorough as well as give himself a bit of time to get his shit together. When he was finished and could no longer delay, he grabbed Peter’s hand, gripping it tightly. He started to babble off pre-flight instructions to distract himself. “The change in pressure is going to be pretty noticeable in a small plane like this – don’t freak out, we’ll level out and you’ll be alright. Talk into the headphones if you need anything.”

Before he could talk himself out of it, Tony flipped the controls and steered the plane out of the open doors out onto the runway. His eyes bulged for a second, then his training kicked it like it always did – he kicked the plane into gear and took off down the runway. At the perfect moment, Tony pulled the plane off the ground, the wheels tucking in once they levelled out.

“Holy shit – that feels so different than in a commercial airplane. No wonder people like this so much,” Peter exclaimed, his tinny voice coming down the line and into the speaker in the headset. His voice surrounded Tony and filled his ears. The skin on his arm prickled, the old rush of being in control and the new stimulus of Peter’s excitement combining to make the ultimate feeling. Tony felt himself chuckle, all of the worries that could so easily overwhelm him washing away.

“It’s pretty cool, right? There’s nothing like being up here, tangling with the clouds. Here in a second, we’ll be able to see the sunset – the view is something else.” Tony said, his hands turning the steering mechanism to put them parallel with the setting sun. “This is the only time of the day you’ll see colors like this.” He pointed towards the crisp purples and pinks, the edge of the sunset like sherbet ice cream – bright and colorful.

Tony kept them out for another thirty minutes or so, the tail end of the sunset leading him back to the runway and eventually on the ground and back in the hangar. Peter ripped his headset off when Tony flipped the engine off – the cockpit now silent. “Tony, that was amazing.” Peter looked at him with eyes that were completely overtaken by a dark pupil, the excitement tangible within them.

Pulling off his own headset, Tony found himself nodding – it had been amazing. The last hour was the best bit of flight time he could claim since coming back from Iraq. He usually felt prickly and uneasy, like he was forcing himself to sit there and be okay with something that brought him so many mixed emotions. Not today, though – it was like the before times, when he felt the most confident behind the control panel. “It was. It really was. The best flight I’ve had in a long time, actually.”

As if he understood the magnitude of that statement, Peter reached over and gripped his hand. The smile on his face made Tony feel fuzzy, his body a little floaty from the endorphins still coursing through him. “Uh – let’s get down and back to solid ground. I promised you a tour around some of the latest projects.”

About an hour later, both of them were covered in grease and laughing, Tony completely blown away by Peter’s knowledge and the easy way he carried himself. There was obviously a gap between cars and planes, but Peter was smart enough to realize that and ask relevant questions when he didn’t quite understand. Tony did the practical thing and got his hands dirty, using the actual pieces to describe the big differences between automotive and aerospace engineering.

Tony led them to the clean-up area where they attempted to get the clingy oil from their skin. Standing close together, Tony and Peter bumped shoulders as they ran their hands under the water and used an overabundance of heavy-duty soap.

Turning the water off, Tony glanced over at Peter and let out a little laugh. “You have a little – “ Tony started, his hand coming up to swipe his thumb across the line of oil on Peter’s cheek. Cupping his cheek, Tony turned his body slightly, his chest pressing against Peter’s when he did the same.

Searching Peter’s eyes when their gazes eventually locked, Tony leaned forward. There seemed to be an unspoken question and answer exchanged before their lips met. It was tentative and soft, Tony doing his best to gauge Peter’s reactions before pushing any further. Reading his mind, Peter wrapped his still wet hands around Tony’s neck and narrowed the space between them even more. Tony tilted his head, the move deepening the kiss and breaking the imaginary line they’d been trying not to cross. A soft moan left Peter’s lips, the gust of it tickling Tony’s lips.

They stayed tangled up for a while, Tony pulled back whenever he needed breath only to tilt his head forward and rest it against Peter’s. The shared breath between them eventually pulled them back together, the smile Tony got to kiss off of Peter’s lips irresistible, yanking him in time and time again. It seemed like hours had gone by when they finally resurface, Tony caught between being overrun by arousal and floating away from the very spot he was standing.

“Pete, I – “ Tony started, his lips tingling and cheeks a dark shade of red.

Peter stopped him with another soft kiss, the press of their lips together sending tingles down Tony’s spine. “Me too, Tony. Me too. Thank you for tonight. This was the most fun I’ve had on a first date.” He ran his fingers through Tony’s hair and beamed at him, the words sinking in just a bit more with the touch.

“Does that mean we can do this again? I’d really like to.” Tony hated the vulnerable tremble in his voice – he didn’t really know what he was doing, he simply let his instincts kick in and guide him.

Nuzzling their noses together, Peter whispered “of course” against his lips, the tickle of his breath sending a shiver down his spin. Tony brought Peter close again, his happiness sitting tangibly in the air surrounding them both.

\----

Two months and several dates later, Tony finally felt comfortable enough to invite Peter in – and that meant in all ways. They usually ended their dates against the door of Peter’s apartment, Tony pressing the younger man against the wood and attacking his mouth with vigor. The second Peter tried to take it any further, Tony took a step back, ducked his head, and retreated with a final, chaste kiss on his boyfriend’s lips. He’d only been intimate one time in his life and it was rough and kind of embarrassing – he wanted to feel comfortable before putting himself in that position again.

After a really delightful night laying out in the middle of the airfield watching the stars, Tony invited Peter back to his place. They climbed into Tony’s truck and made idle chit chat the entire way back to the little ranch house. Peter’s eyes lit up when he saw the huge wrap around porch. In all the time they spent together, Tony never brought Peter to his place – it took him forever to feel at home there, he needed to be sure of things with the other man before inviting him into his safe space.

And he was – sure of things. Peter was calm and patient, the man’s first thought always to rationalize, not react. It was the perfect juxtaposition to the unyielding randomness that Tony’s emotions could pull from him. He’d only shown his true colors around Peter a couple of times – and each time he did, his boyfriend waited until Tony worked through the anxiety, sitting right next to him the entire time. He’d pull him close when Tony was ready, then hold him close when it all became too much. It was a lot to ask from another person and Peter handled it with grace.

Walking into the house, Tony kicked off his shoes and put his keys in the little dish by the door. Peter followed him in, his hands gripping Tony’s hips tightly. Without stopping, Tony led them up the stairs and to the right, his heart thundering with each step that took them closer to his bedroom at the end of the hall. By the time he got there, his hands were dripping with sweat. Peter closed the door behind them and pushed Tony against it, the hands on his hips guiding him, keeping him grounded.

“You okay, Tones? We don’t have to do anything. I just – want to hold you, if nothing else,” Peter mumbled, his nose brushing Tony’s before pressing soft little kisses to his cheeks, forehead, and lips. Tony slammed his eyes shut, the tenderness of the touches something he never experienced before. He kept them closed while Peter peppered soft licks and touches around his face and down his neck.

A soft groan left his lips, his head tilting further to the side to give Peter more room to work with. “I’m fine. I want to – I really, really do. It – it has been a really long time since I’ve done anything like this. I’m nervous,” Tony babbled, his inhibitions leaving him the more Peter tenderly explored him. “I’m just really fucking nervous,” he repeated again, his hands finally joining the party to run down the length of Peter’s sides, the hardness there making his hips thrust up in search of friction.

Peter gripped his cheeks in both hands, thumbs brushing across Tony’s prominent cheek bones. “It’s okay. I’ll take care of you, Tony.” He used the leverage of his hands to pull Tony’s head up until their eyes met. “I’ll take care of you,” Peter reiterated, the grip of his hands tightening a little bit. Tony didn’t give himself a chance to question or even think about the words coming out of Peter’s mouth. The simple fact that he thought to say them meant the world.

Skillful hands undressed him, first his shirt and undershirt, then his pants and the black boxer-briefs he picked out for this specific thing. Peter looked at him like he was something special, each new piece of skin revealed a treasure for him to explore. When Peter joined him in nudity, Tony let out a deep sigh, his hands shakily running down Peter’s flanks, tracing the round globes of his ass, and across a tight stomach. He let his hand flatten and press against tight abs as Peter settled between his legs and covered him with his body.

Soft lips distracted him enough that he didn’t hear the loud snick of the lube cap being opened, nor did he notice the cold lube being pooled on his flat stomach. It wasn’t until Peter pulled away and spread his legs that Tony caught on to what was happening. Brown eyes searched Tony’s for a moment, his head nodding on its own accord – he wanted Peter, there was no guess work necessary.

The first finger felt odd, it’d been a long time since something penetrated him that way. Peter kept the pace slow, his finger moving in and out against the ebb and flow of Tony’s muscles contracting and relaxing. Tony let out a howl when Peter pressed against his prostate. “Fuck, do that again,” Tony practically screamed, his entire body humping up to move against Peter’s finger and have that spot touched again.

Peter worked him through the second and third finger flawlessly. The needier he got, the less Tony worried about his nerves and the vulnerability he was portraying. He could feel Peter’s stiffness against his leg, the entire process wasn’t just affecting Tony in such a monumental way. His boyfriend muttered little praises and compliments while he worked him over – Peter’s hand going back and forth between rubbing long strokes across Tony’s chest and pulling his cock with self-assured strokes.

When Peter eventually slipped inside, Tony was half mad from want – his body thrumming, every nerve ending sensitive and slowly burning him up from the inside out. Tony grabbed Peter’s sides and gripped them tightly. Peter braced his elbows on either side of Tony’s head and kept them close. The gentle slide of Peter’s stomach against Tony’s cock made the impact of each of his boyfriend’s thrusts magnified ten-fold.

“Pete, fuck – you feel amazing. Making me feel so good.” Tony didn’t even know the words were coming out of his mouth – his brain was completely overtaken by sensation.

An inevitable crescendo came when Peter started to pick up the pace of his thrusts, his hands gripping Tony’s thighs tightly, using the momentum to pull him back against his cock with each one. The tip of Peter’s cock hit Tony’s prostate head on, the overwhelming feeling of it spreading from his core, down his arms and legs, and settling in the tips of his fingers and toes. His entire body felt like it might leave this plane and float away to another.

“I can’t believe you’re mine. You’re so good. Fuck – you’re so goddamn good. I’m so, so close – you’ve been perfect for me, baby.” Peter pulled Tony’s ear between his teeth as he spoke, each word coming out as a gasp and enunciated by the thrust forward and the gentle nudge against his prostate. Tony didn’t have any chance of holding on anymore and came across both their stomachs with a loud shout of Peter’s name.

Tony counted two more strokes out before Peter was collapsing on top of him, his harshly panted breath coating the side of Tony’s neck, making his skin prickle with oversensitivity. Peter pressed a kiss to the little bits of skin he could find and let his hips thrust through the rest of his orgasm. He almost wished they hadn’t been so responsible, Tony wondered what it would feel like, to be so completely filled by Peter’s cum.

Bringing his bottom lip between his teeth when Peter pulled out, Tony let himself relax against the bed, his body now boneless. Peter got rid of the condom, crawling back into bed after dropping it in the garbage and wiping them both off with a towel he found on the floor. Tony laid flat on the bed and opened his arms, Peter settling into the gap against his side and fitting perfectly. Their arms wrapped around each other and for the first time in a while, Tony fell into a soundless sleep.

At least, he thought it was going to be soundless. He wasn’t sure how long it’d been, but the next time he was blinking awake, Peter was shaking his shoulders, his boyfriend looking at him with a mixture of confusion and sadness. Through the fog he could hear Peter calling to him – “Tony, Tony – wake up. You’re having a bad dream.” The words seemed to hit his ears and ping right off, his brain still stuck on the battlefield, his hands still immobile in the imaginary binds around his wrist.

Wetness against his cheek was the thing that truly brought him out of the waking memory he’d been trapped in. Gasping, he looked up helplessly – Peter’s eyes were wide and dripping tears, his hands restlessly moving over Tony’s long hair. “Pete? Where are we?” Tony tried to cling to reality, his hands finally free to move, his fingers digging into warm skin and clinging.

“We’re in your bedroom. It’s 3AM on a Friday morning. You’re safe.” Peter’s voice was wobbly, and tears were streaming freely down his face. The way they landed on his skin was one of the only things keeping him in that moment – his brain still a little fuzzy. Peter looked at him with so much affection, Tony wished he was lucid enough to truly remember it. “You’re safe, Tony – I promise.”

Peter tucked his head into Tony’s neck and wrapped him up in his arms. Tony slowly relaxed his bruising grip on Peter’s skin and laid his palms flat on his back instead. The full body contact they were creating pulled him back from the haze one minute at a time – Peter’s tears and the definitive warmth of his limbs pressing against Tony’s own just enough to keep him right where he needed to be.

What seemed like forever later, Tony felt like himself enough to wrap Peter up and roll them over, his chest pressing Peter down into the mattress. “Thank you,” he muttered, his nose pressing against Peter’s cheek. “I was still in my cell in that camp – I heard you put couldn’t get to you. Thanks for getting me back.” He pressed their lips together, the chest under his own shaking a little.

“Sorry, I couldn’t get to you sooner,” Peter said weakly, his voice tear soaked, his face red and puffy. It made Tony’s heart ache – the feeling he pulled out of the man he loved. And he did – love him. It didn’t take much thought to understand just how good of a person the man in his arms was. He looked scared out of his mind, but his arms clung to Tony’s body and kept him close. The tears in his eyes weren’t for himself, Tony knew that – they were for all the pain he witnessed Tony go through.

In their time together, Tony slowly started to open up about his experiences. It made for some nights that were so bogged down by bad memories it was a little hard to bear, but Peter stayed with him and let him talk until it was all gone. He cried with him and held him tightly – Tony didn’t understand how much he needed that until he experienced the tenderness that Peter so easily shared with him. In instances like this one, he never expected any sort of explanation, he simply held him tightly.

Leaning down, Tony pressed their lips together in a messy kiss, the two of them clinging to each other until sleep claimed them again. This time, Tony slept soundly in the cocoon of Peter’s arms, the protective hold his boyfriend kept around him all night keeping him far away from the demons always trying to pull him under.

The next morning, Tony was surprised to see Peter under him still. Despite how well his boyfriend took all the crazy shit that came with being Tony, he didn’t know what to expect after witnessing something that Tony had no control over and had a hard time coming back from. The tears in Peter’s eyes scared him, he understood how hard it was to deal with – he hadn’t adjusted to it after almost 15 years of being haunted by it.

Peter must’ve been waiting for him to move – his arms tightened around Tony’s hips when he tried to get up. “Nope. I need this. Lay still for another couple of minutes,” Peter mumbled, his eyes staying closed.

“Let me roll over a little, my arm is numb,” Tony replied, his voice deep and bogged down by the sleep that wanted to draw him back in. Little by little, Peter let the grip he had on Tony loosen so he could readjust and turn onto his side, his right arm glad to be free from the pressure of his body weight on top of it. “That’s way better.” He let out a soft sigh as Peter pulled him back and against his chest, the warmth there lulling him into relaxing further into the bed.

Tony fought off sleep by concentrating on Peter’s hand rubbing small circles up and down his stomach, his muscles clenching under the tease of the caress. He pushed back a little, his back flattening against Peter’s chest a little bit more. “I love you, Pete,” Tony whispered, his right-hand pressing Peter’s hand flat against his stomach. “I didn’t think I knew what that was, but I think I do now. It’s this, you – being here and never wanting it to end.”

“I love you, too. You scare the fucking shit out of me, Tony. I don’t know if I’m ever navigating stuff right, but I want to try. You’re it for me, old man.” Peter’s lips pressed against the back of Tony’s neck as he spoke, the words and kisses getting mixed together to create an unnamable sensation.

Neither Steve nor Rhodey said a word when he wondered in three hours later than usual, a haunted look in his eye but the slightest bit of a smile on his lips. He counted it progress, getting up out of bed and actually contributing so soon after a bad night. The guys slapped him on the back and let him wander off to do his own thing when he felt good enough to be near them for a few minutes. And around lunch, Tony finally found it in himself to sit with the two of them and be present for a conversation. It didn’t hurt that Rhodey promised him a cup of coffee from Ben’s sitting on the table as enticement.

It felt good to have people that knew him surrounding him. He felt exhausted, but the ease in which he could just be with Rhodey and Steve eased the tension in his shoulders and brought back a little bit of energy from the reserves. The taste of his favorite dark roast made him think of Peter and he immediately felt a little bit stronger. By the end of the day, he was back in under the hood of the Sector with Steve flanking him with the tools.

Later, when Peter walked in with a carrier of coffee, they all broke away from the work and pulled his boyfriend into a hug. His friends took to having Peter around as easily as they accepted all of Tony. Rhodey said it was because Peter brought a bit of the old Tony back, but he figured the man’s charismatic personality and overall ease at pleasing people had something to do with it, too. Tony looked around the room at the end of the day and finally understood what being home actually meant.

He’d been floating for years, stuck between a place that was literal hell and one that he tried to run away from all of his life. It took a little bit of perspective to see what he’d been building and who he’d been putting the bricks and mortar together with. The only people he ever needed were sitting around the table, laughing and joking around – enjoying the hell out of each other’s presence.

Wrapping an arm around Peter’s shoulders and tugging him closer, Tony pressing a kiss to the side of his head, his cheek resting there. Peter relaxed into him, no questions asked – his hand finding Tony’s fingers and tangling his own with them. The dredges of his memories were at the edges of his thoughts trying to dig in – but the weight of Peter against him and the friends around him kept him there. The tiny victory enough to reduce the size of the monkey clinging to his back.

It was still there but getting smaller all the time.

\----

A couple years later found him and Peter married, their lives completely intertwined.

There was evidence of his younger husband all over the ranch house. The room Tony used for storage quickly became an office, and the master bedroom got the makeover of a century when they knocked the wall in trying to get Peter’s huge bed through the doorframe. They opened up the wall between the master and the room next to it and put in an entertainment center that had all the bells and whistles. They constructed most of it together in one of the man insomnia fueled all-nighters Peter joined him for.

Tony found a direct link to his anxiety and the garage, so he stepped back from it and helped Peter at the shop when he was feeling a little extra stir crazy. He would get his fix of too much coffee and an overabundance of Peter’s calming presence before going back and letting his passion drag him under once again. Tony figured out that balance was the key to not getting so caught up in the things that made him a little extra antsy.

He also figured out that time away from his beloved airplanes made his return to the hangar and the aircrafts themselves so much more meaningful. Tony got to approach them with a little less anxiety and a lot more interest and excitement.

Whenever Tony was feeling extra good, he would take Peter up into the clouds and just enjoy the view. It was one thing to dream about flying and touching the sky – and a whole other to be doing it with his best friend. Reaching across to take Peter’s hand, Tony pressed a kiss to the back of it before turning the plane and heading back toward Stark’s.

The clouds were nice, but the reality he made for himself was even better.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for tagging along! 
> 
> If you want to see a specific prompt, or simply want to follow along with my shorter stuff, head over to tumblr - I'm ohwereusingourmadeupnames over there! 
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> Love you all <3


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